not too long ago was Valentines' Day.. in fact, it was 2 days ago..
Happy chinese new year! on the first on new year, i went to pasir ris to visit grandparents.. together with dar.. well, bitch was there but well, i'm not at all concerned if she's there or not.. well, they kinda know that i have a boyfriend now.. dunno why, i get really emotional during chinese new year.. probably it's because i get to visit my relatives and have a flashback of my childhood.. not just on the unhappy memories, but on the happy ones too...like how everyone doted on me..
then went to Dar's relatives' place.. was sitting beside dar all the while, see him play mahjong.. was quite bored, so took a short walk to Hougang point..then shun bian use the toilet there to poo poo *keke* got aircon mah..
then went to nanny's house in the evening.. Dar came along too.. then met my mom... again, they chatted...this time about biz.. think Dar got a little interested..
anyway, to conclude, this chinese new year is a little weird... dunno how to explain leh.. i feel kinda close to my mom... budden again, i didn't even step into my own house... instead, i'm at dar's house.. hiya, dunno lah...
sometimes i even felt that it's a wrong move to move to dar's place.. coz it's even more conflicting.. i have plans... probably to germ's place.. perhaps.. things would be better if we see less of each other... also.. dar's mom thot of buying car... i wouldn't mind going for this idea.. but wat if things dun turn out the way it is... sigh.. i really dunno..
i just feel extremely pressurised.. and i really don't like the way things are now.. i mean... yes.. money is important.. but so wat? it's never enough.. now i finally understand the meaning of "money is the root of all evil"... but please... i need space... my own space.. i really seriously feel like a robot now... i'm feelingless... i'm numb.. there's no life and love in me anymore..
z o m b i e~
ConFLict..
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